Special* : Woah! Heart broken...

As a person, I understand how easy it is to perceive and presume. Out of human nature, both laziness and convenience, people usually take the easy way out in judging person. After all, how understanding can a person really gets.. and not to forget, it takes constant effort and time to really understand someone, or even an event (or situation) carefully to past judgment onto it. Out of circumstances, people's mind are required to think faster than the mouth, and in any usual 'picture', mouth acts after than brain could.. And this explains for the saying, 'talking is cheap'.

As the brief introduction I wrote on top summaries a bit about the heart broken part.. And how did all the things happen, why not let me put it in a story-telling form and you'll understand why:

Out of one sunny and fair weather, I was in a pretty good mood. With clear-mind and high spirit, I and Darius planned to spend time together, just the two of us. The kind of situation seems pretty weird between I and Darius is a very long past event. And from the emphasis of the 'just the two of us', it is reasonable to assume that we kind of wanted to be left alone.. and yes, we are Friends (Friends with a big 'F', there's great emphasis on the caps 'F' and 'f', so mind this). I planned to meet him right after I finish getting my dental appointment, I'm suppose to go there and get my surgical portion checked for infection and a bit of washing and am ready to go.

We walked practically the whole of Singapore central area, including Orchard area, City Hall area and Bugis. From Tanglin Mall area, we figured our way walking to Bugis to get some errand done, collect Wireless and adapter thing. And then, we proceed to Bugis Junction TCC sit down and chat over coffee. I just love the feeling of tai tai (in Chinese. English it means women living on high society's life).. the feeling of no worries and chilling out, putting aside all stress and burden of the mind. And sometimes, can be pretty inspiring and brings out topics and conversations.

Something about this Darius guy.. A pretty rare species of Capricorn whether when it comes to speaking, thinking or acting. Can easily create confusion and likes to speak halfway and stop. It's very hard to get things done on his side, and usually knowing people is easy for him, but to come across really sincere people is very scarce. Can be pretty much of a weakest link somewhere.. I guess he doesn't really put his heart to the things he does. Motivation level in life: three out of ten stars.

Okay, back to the story. So after the enjoyable time we had at Bugis TCC, we got back on our foot and start walking to Shaw House and then to Suntec City. Why to Shaw House, is because I made a mistake in telling him there's two building: one is called Shaw Tower in Bugis area and the other Shaw House which some called it Liat Tower aka Isetan. Big mistake, didn't have enough sleep.. so to Shaw House we went. After that, to Suntec City, then the critical part came...

We spoke about something maybe we shouldn't have. Darius was telling me how his group of friends thought of me. Well, a bit info about this group of friends. Darius closest group of friends are a group of people that usually do club (just like I do). And Darius did showed me those important figures that is more closer and more dearer to him. And next he said something like his group of friends was commenting why was he still so keen in me when I behaves pretty loose in club.. in the way of when Darius is around can still go dance with people, etc.

It caught my attention, 'I'm listening...' and Darius continued.. His friends thinks that I don't really deserve such a nice guy, Darius, and something like can just dump me and move on looking for other guys lah. Thinking back, Darius did mentioned a few instances which seems to be mattered by him and not me saying I dances with people I don't know (don't remember that). It didn't hit me that hard then.. I was thinking, 'Darius know me long enough to know what I do and what I don't. Misunderstanding perhaps...'

But I don't know why, what was being said seems to stay in my mind longer than usual. I usually don't care about how insignificant people comments in my life, because the core value 'I live my life, not them'. But comments coming out from some of this friends seems pretty bothering at times, as if I really care about how they think. Daniel, Joel and several others perhaps... Well, I really shouldn't as they don't know me well, assumptions usually ain't the true-est when come out this way. What's happening to me lah...