Have a break.. from Love

This is something that probably told but not blogged about. But anyway, I thought probably, I should as well blog about it and refer to it as the thoughts of my mind whenever I have doubts. You see, I have made a very big decision sometime in 2009 which is going to affect me in the short run. And this decision don't seem to be very welcomed nor responded well when I begin to speak of it back then. It's as a matter of fact, something which I presume noone would have supported this decision anyway, after all we are living in a very 'now' century.

You see, back in 2008, I had this idea. This idea of thriving successes in career and academically, which ultimately, the offspring will be financial stability and intellectual-level benchmarking. And I had planned everything all out nicely and beautifully over the next five years. All about indulging in work and night-classes, befriending more books and texts on top of my social life and personal time. Living a life beyond what Singapore life already gotten me, beyond the 9-to-6 life.

And where do the energy and time come from? It comes from the single and available me. It comes from the already starting to learn to used to the tensed life of evening classes and working out my budgets with the pay from my salary no doubt they are peanuts. And finally the plan has gotten a head start soon after sometime in September (2008).

But here comes a few catches, one of those obvious turn out to be I don't wish to be involved in any relationship, love, dating, or even seeing someone. Something which I suppose was strongly criticized on, and disagreed to by many people that come across such "conditions". Who is to blame? No one! But anyway, shaken it maybe but I still feel it's there for some good personal reasons.

1. The one of those reasons which I think vaild: I wouldn't have time nor energy to initiate, conduct and maintain any of such acts (relationship, love, dating, seeing someone). And if I don't put in these required effort, I don't see a point in being in it. Similarly, why do you go into war zone knowing that you don't have enough resources?
2. Linking to another of my personal choice of getting serious for three relationships, I don't need to rush into my third one anyway. Well, after all I had two relationships count till now.
3. In the age of 20-30, probably, it wasn't the ideal age to get into settlement in Singapore (in gay context) I thought. See, in such critical age, in such competitive country, in such environment, people should be taking responsibilities more in getting career built-up, earning substantial income and making paths for the future. It wasn't easy for some parents to raise some kids up and supporting them financially for 20<>

Hmm.. Don't feel like going on elaborating about it further.. =X But then, after the 5 years, I do wish to at least have achieved a Masters in Accountancy and Certified Public Accountant certifications with roughly 3 years of Audit working experience. Hmm.. Plans mah, made to be achieved. Wish me good luck.